Minecraft

So Minecraft... I am still not sure about the Mojang game that came out a couple of years ago. I tried it out back in 2011, when I heard of all the hype about it. Figured I would be hooked one the game instantly, but to talk you the truth... I wasn't. I played it for maybe a week but, kept going back to LittleBigPlanet to unleash my creative juices. Plus, I am not much of a PC gamer. Console all the way baby!

Recently I bought a iPhone 5 and was surfing he web for some good games to get. Came across a review for Minecraft Pocket Edition, and it intrigued me to give it another try. This time I was hooked. Played for over eight hours straight, building a baller two story house with a creepy Evil Dead basement. Any spare time I have, like waiting in line, a bus ride, sitting in the doctor's office about it get a STD check or taking a massive shit, I am mining the fuck out the side of a mountain. Even just walking around destroying zombies and slaughter pigs or sheep is fun.

One thing I have to mention is that I am bad at Minecraft. It took me forever to learn to play it, I still don't know how to farm. My building skill are sub par at best. I have seen some awesome shit from other people online. My creations looks like a three year old threw some Legos together. None the less, I am starting to see what the hype is about. Don't think I will ever get the PC or Xbox version. I know there is more features, but I really like having this little creative sandbox game in my pocket at all times.

Just a few thoughts for anyone looking to get into Minecraft. I suggest giving it a try.

Tiny Tower Review

I had a bitch of a time downloading Tiny Towers, it had nothing to do with the Developers, Nimblebit, or the operating systems. I just lost my iPod cord, and password to my Apple account. After changing my account setting and getting an extra cable from a co-worker, I finally could get my hands on the manager simulation game I have heard so much about. Also being completely a pixelated game is always a plus in my book.

Tiny Tower is a extremely pointless and ridiculously addictive management simulation game developed by Nimblebit. Tiny Tower was first released for Apple's iOS June 23, 2001 and later on Android devices November 16th. The premise of the game is to builds a skyscraper one level at a time. Inside your tower, players can choose to build residential and commercial floors and fill them with "Bitizens". Building up additional stories on top of your tower costs coins and you need to properly manage the businesses and the Bitizens working and living in your tower to gain financial success.

Your tower is highly customizalbe, you can choose between five different business floors; Food, Service, Recreation, Retail, and Creative. Of course you also have to have Residential, Bitizens need somewhere to live. The rest of the customization includes the paint scheme, names of the businesses and paint the residential floors and the clothing of the Bitizens. You control what items are sold in the businesses, responsible for hiring the right Bitizen for the job and keeping the shelves stocked. The more staff the business has, better items can be sold. The better the item, the longer you have to wait to restock, but the stock sells at a better price.

Yes I said "wait" back there. This is still, what I like to call, a "facebook" game. Like FarmVille, you have to wait to do pretty much anything. Unlike other games like FarmVille, Tiny Towers' wait times are a lot shorter and the tower is operational 24/7, even if your device is off. In the beginning things go along quickly but as your tower becomes bigger, things start to cost more and the wait time is longer. If you want, you have the option to buy "Tower Bux" with your credit card. I was drunk last night and bought thirty dollars worth, stupid... You can also get "Tower Bux" by random elevator rides, building another floor or doing missions. This takes forever and buying them lets you play a lot more without waiting around.  The missions are a nice touch. Giving you something to strive for, but they are kind of pointless in the beginning of the game. I still have only completed one. Just don't have the right businesses for them right now.

All in all, this is a great game you can carry around and play for ten minutes, waiting for the bus or standing in line at the D.M.V. The fact that productivity never stop, even when your device is turned off, is crucial in making money for more levels on your tower.  The customization is just amazing. I love the fact that I can call my Tea Shop, The Teabagger and have the Bitizen working dressed as a biker. Just as too bad I can't change his name to Mr. Slave. As mush as I hate ":facebook" type games, the wait times are bearable and there is always something to do, customize, move floors and employees around and check out "Bitbook" and stats. Tiny Tower might not be a game you sit down and play for hours. It's not perfect but it's like smoking cigarettes, it fills the little voids in our daily, mundane lives.

And for that,
I give it a Tiny Eight out of Ten.

           

   

WTF Final Fantasy?

Really Square Enix...

What's the deal Square Enix? Why have you chosen to make the Final Fantasy series so complicated to follow? From Final Fantasy II up to Final Fantasy VII is a scrambled mess. Okay the original Final Fantasy came out in Japan in my birth year of 1987 for the Nintendo Entertainment System. It didn't drop in North America until 1990. Then Final Fantasy II rocked Japan in 1988 but never touched North American soil. In fact this is where the confusion starts, FF-II and Final Fantasy III (1990) never came out in North America. When Final Fantasy IV debuted in 1991 in Japan, we were already way behind. Since neither FF-II and FF-III were never released in North America, Final Fantasy IV was label as Final Fantasy II for us westerns. Confused yet? Well it doesn't stop there.

Final Fantasy V was released in Japan back in 1992 and two years later, 1994, came Final Fantasy VI. I have no fucking clue what happened to Final Fantasy V, but Final Fantasy VI was released here as Final Fantasy III. Now Even I am getting lost,... What Final Fantasy games have I played as a child? I guess the first one, FF-IV and FF-VI. Did we missed out on FF-II, FF-III and FF-V? I feel cheated! Actually I knew nothing about it until a few years ago when I was playing the remake of Final Fantasy IV for Nintendo DS. Considering it was my first time seeing, hearing or thinking about Final Fantasy IV, I was a surprised to see that it was just FF-II! My friend tried to explain how FF-II for Super Nintendo was just basically FF-IV for Super Famicom in Japan.

Once the Sony Playstation came out the Roman Numerals started to make more sense and we quit missing out on games. Final Fantasy VII (1997), FF-VIII (1999), FF-IX (2000), FF-X (2001), FF-XI (2002), FF-XII (2006), FF-XIII (2009) and even FF-XIV (2010) are all in order and are the same both in Japan and North America. The spin-offs though! My holy fucking science there is lots of Final Fantasy games. Then there is the remakes of a new of the new ones like Final Fantasy X-2 and the soon coming Final Fantasy XIII-2. Let's not to forget the spin-offs... the numerous spin-offs. Final Fantasy Tactics, Crystal Chronicles, Kingdom Hearts and the Chocobo Series, just to name a few.

Okay now my head is truly spinning. It might be all the mixed up Roman Numerals and spin-offs, or the mickey of rye I just drank. None the less, the Final Fantasy series is a truly a epic saga and has changed the face of video games forever. Good Luck remembering the order though...  

Fucking Pawn Shops!!!

I have to quit buying most of my gaming shit from fucking pawn shops. You have to think, someone brought them to the pawn shop for a reason. Sometimes it because they have moved on or upgraded, half the time they sell to pawn shops because it's a piece of shit that barely works. The other day I was shopping around for a external hard-drive but could find one I likes so I figured I could buy a PSP with the extra cash. Of course I went to the pawn shop to see what they had. From what I could remember they had few models of the PSP, earlier ones and newer ones including the PSP GO. Kind of had my heart set on the PSP GO, but they must of sold it.

The whole reason I wanted a Playstation Portable was that I accidentally downloaded a bunch of games for it, thinking they were for the Playstation 3. Since the PSP GO was sold, I bought a PSP-1000. Was pretty stoked got it for pretty cheap. I don't live far from the pawn shop, so it didn't take me long it get home and plug the thing in. Nothing happened... No lights, sounds, or video, just nothing. Within fifteen minutes of buying it I was back at the pawn shop complaining they sold me a bricked PSP. The owner plugged it in with the charger that I bought with it and it powered up right away. For a moment I felt like a fool, I should of tried a few other power outlets before I brought it back. Luckily for me I didn't look like a fool for long, none of the buttons would work.

We tried most of the PSPs that he had in the store and most of them didn't work. He was going on about how people bring them in when they have been having problems with them. Most of them are turned away but sometimes the game works long enough to be bought by the pawn shop. I really didn't care I just wanted a working PSP. Finally he pulled out a newer PSP-3000 from a drawer and tried it out. This one seemed to work perfect. Since I went through all this, he hooked me up with the PSP-3000 with a 2GB Sony Memory Stick Duo for the no extra charge. Also picked up Manhunt 2 for a discounted price.

This made me question buying from pawn shops, but this was a couple of weeks ago. The other night my Nintendo Wii wouldn't turn on at all, I tried unplugging it and tried different outlets but nothing. I bought it from the same pawn shop I got a the PSP from but a few weeks earlier. Everything was working fine with it, never would of thought it would just stop working. Thankfully it started working again this morning and everything seems fine again. Now I am really concerned about buying consoles at pawnshops, you never know what you are getting. I have had better luck with getting consoles from my friends then pawn shops.

Well this is life I guess, I think I would rather buy consoles, CIB, online now. For the games themselves I still will get the majority of them from pawn shops or used video game store. I still haven't bought a game that doesn't work.

Donkey Kong Obsession

Lately I have been obsessed with the classic arcade game from Nintendo, Donkey Kong. Ever since I seen King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters on Netflix, I have been trying my hardest to get my hands on any port of the game. Having a M.A.M.E. original Donkey Kong cabinet would be the best, unfortunately they are rare to come by and are way out of my price range. King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters is a great documentary directed by Seth Gordon, and a must see by any lover of arcade games and classic games. The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters is a 2007 American documentary that follows Steve Wiebe as he tries to take the world record high score for the arcade game Donkey Kong from reigning champion and douchebag Billy Mitchell. I was lucky enough to seen it on Netflix, but I recently heard it's not Netflix's catalogue anymore.

The fact that Donkey Kong was around six years before I was born in 1987, I am not too familiar with the game. Not like I knew nothing before I seen King of Kong, there are just some things that every hardcore gamer know. It was the first game to feature two of Nintendo more predominant characters, Mario and Donkey Kong. Some would argue that it also features Princess Peach, but anyone that knows their shit, will tell you her name is Pauline and definitely isn't Peach. Yes that is right! Mario is a two timing fuck. Originally, Mario was called Jumpman and Pauline was just called, Lady. Made apparently clear in A Fistful of Quarters, is that Donkey Kong is notoriously difficult game. Some guy from the movie stated that most people can't play more then a minute and if they can, they rarely make it past the third board.

Guess I should explain the game to those of you that don't know. Even those I am more familiar with Donkey Kong Country then the original Thanks to the powers of the internet, I have gotten a good port of the game and have learned a lot. The game is divided into four different one-screen stages. Each represents 25 meters of the structure Donkey Kong has climbed, one stage being 25 meters higher than the previous. Mario must scale a seven-story construction site made of crooked girders and ladders while jumping over or hammering barrels thrown by Donkey Kong. Mario must also avoid flaming balls, which generate when an oil barrel collides with the oil drum. Players routinely call this screen "Barrels". There is three other screens, "Factory", "Elevators", and "Rivets" that are name after the layout of each screen. These screens combine to form levels, which become progressively tougher. Believe me they do get tougher.

My first experience with classic Kong Kong was for the Intellivision console from Mattel. I found a copy of the game in the original box for really cheap at a local pawn shop. I was a little confused because the box had Nintendo logo across it but was made by Coleco. Still I was excited to play it, but the excitement was short lived. This was the worst port of the game, it looked and played nothing like the NES port or at the arcade. I looked into it and think that Coleco made it shitty on purpose to make their own console, The Colecovision, look better. According to Wikipedia;

"Makers of video game consoles were also interested. Taito offered a considerable sum to buy all rights to Donkey Kong, but Nintendo turned them down^. Rivals Coleco and Atari approached Nintendo in Japan and the United States respectively. In the end, Nintendo granted Coleco exclusive console and tabletop rights to Donkey Kong because he felt that "It [was] the hungriest company". In addition, Arakawa felt that as a more established company in the US, Coleco could better handle marketing. In return, Nintendo would receive an undisclosed lump sum plus $1.40 per game cartridge sold and $1 per tabletop unit."

Wish I had this...

Since Donkey Kong for Intellivision suck um... well... Donkey Dick, I was still looking for a good port of Donkey Kong. A co-worker told me about how she had to beat the classic Donkey Kong to get a golden banana in Donkey Kong 64. That's it! I knew I could find a copy of Donkey Kong 64 at my mother's house. I found it and brought it home, but it wouldn't work. Couldn't figure out why. After trying everything to get this damn game working, the answer was right there on the cover-art of the box. Expansion Pack included! The Nintendo 64 is was testing it on didn't have the expansion pack. Two out of three of my Nintendo 64's have them. but of course I was using the one without it.

Been playing Donkey Kong 64 for a couple of nights now before bed, trying to get to the third stage. Somewhere in the third stage you can play a old school arcade machine with Donkey Kong on. You only have to complete the four screens once for the golden banana, and/or twice for the only Nintendo Coin in the game. Before I could get to the third stage, I found a pretty good deal on a Nintendo Wii. It's a brand new red Nintendo Wii with one controller and New Super Mario Bros. Just fucking around in the Wii Store, I stumbled on to Donkey Kong for Nintendo Entertainment System on Wii's Virtual Console. Jackpot, I am pretty sure that this is the closes I am going to get to playing classic arcade style Donkey Kong. I also got Bubble Bobble, Super C and Legend of Zedla. Not too bad for a hundred bucks.

It's RED!!!

Now all of today has been wasted on playing DK, trying for high scores. My Brother and I, have been battling it out for a good eight hours today. I set the bar pretty low around 40,000, then he got 50,000. It stayed at that for quite a while, when I got just over 60,000. I was sure that was where it was going to stay for the rest of the night. Then out of nowhere, my Brother got 60,400! Took me a while to get a good run in, but I busted out a good 70,000 score. By the end of the night my Brother holds the score at 78,200 with me only trailing behind by 200 points.

Oh before I forget I should mention that this version of Donkey Kong only has three screens per level. They excluded the factory screen. I am not sure how many levels are in the game. The highest level we have seen so far is screen one on level five. Arcade Donkey Kong only goes up to the 22nd screen, before the memory runs out. You can play for a few seconds before Mario just ups and dies on you. They call this a Killscreen, I guess it is rare sight to be seen. Not sure this is what happens on NES or not.

According to the Twin Galaxies website, the highest score achieved on the Wii Virtual Console was 1,125,350! With our scores we would get around 20th place. Which isn't too bad but the top five scores are all in the high hundred thousands. Looks like I have some more practising to do...  

     

Intellivision Might Be One of the Worst Consoles Ever

Last night, I tested out everyone of my Intellivision Games. They all worked, Donkey Kong was the only game to give me trouble. Just needed to be inserted nice and good. After playing all those games, I came to one conclusion... Intellivision is a horrible console.

I may be a little bias, considering I remember playing Space Invaders, Astroids, Pac-Man, and Donkey Kong on Atari 2600. It was just like playing them in the Arcade. They do have most of these games for Intellivision but I haven't played them yet. All I do know is that Donkey Kong is an abomination, personally I believe Coleco sabotage Donkey Kong for Intellivision. They wanted the one for Colecovision to look and play better. The only game I think I could play for more then five minutes would be Skiing. That is some solid alpine racing!

Intellivision debuted in 1979 and was released as a competitor to the Atari 2600. Over 3 million Intellvison consoles were sold before it was discontinued in 1983, with a total of 125 games were released for the console. For the four years the console was out it, received good reviews and in 2009, IGN named the Intellivision the No. 14 greatest video game console of all time. Yet, the controller was ranked the fourth worst video game controller by IGN Editor Craig Harris.

My Intellivision collection might be one of the more complete sets I have seen. All of the games work, and most of the boxes has instructions with controller inlays. The actually game boxes could be in better condition, the cardboard is old and damaged in the seams. Still all and all, pretty fucking good for being from the late Seventies. On ebay and a like, I have seen collections like this go for anywhere from $100 to $500. Still think I would be lucky to get 200, but not too bad for what I paid for it. Still going to be on the look out for other games I don't have.

None of this means I like this system...   

To see pictures related to this article, go to...

Some Pictures of Today's Buys.

Here are a ton of pictures of a good score I got at King of Trade in Lethbridge, Alberta. King of Trade is usually a rip off for older games. They are better for new games, but like any other pawn shop, for older vintage games it's a rip off. It doesn't even have to be a good game. You'll also finded a ton of sport games, shit... mostly sport games actually. The store is fill with them, you have to sift your way through them to find the good games. The store is filled with them because a new one comes out ever year, so every year they becomes obsolete. I still can't believe I got these games.

I picked up Space Armada, Advanced Dungeon and Dragons and the best find of the year... Donkey Kong! All for Intellivision, I have never seen so much Intellivision shit at a pawn shop before. Used to seeing NESs and Super NESs, Sega Genesis and lots of newer systems, never have I seen a Intellivison in the store. The only one there was for sale for a hundred dollars, last time I checked, I could buy one online for twenty bucks. I thought I was getting ripped off when I bought one from my buddy for eighty dollars. It was a bundle, with a system and fourteen game cartridges and boxes. Most of them complete with box, cartridge and controller inlays. I value the collection at one fifty, to two hundred big ones to the right person. I think I got a good deal.

Another sweet score at the pawn shop was that I got some pieces to complete some games. For instance, I got Sonic 2 cartridge for Sega Genesis, where I already had a empty box with instruction manual. Vise versa for Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, I needed the box but already had a cartridge and instruction manual. Luckily for me, I bought a Advance Dungeons and Dragons game without the instruction manual, now I have a extra D&D game cartridge. The rest of the games I bought, was because of the memories they held in my childhood.

Me and my Father played Road Rash back in the 90's when I five or six years old. He is really into Motorcycles and I grew up around them my whole life. Strange though was my Dad didn't get into street bikes till recently. WCW/NWO Revenge is one of the best wrestling video games out there. It captures the essence of Professional Wrestling, just mindless entertainment. I remember playing it with my friend G.R., high as a Giraffe's cunt. We would sit in his Mom's basement and play that game for hours, everyday. Fuck, it might have been the game before it, WCW vs NWO, I can't remember... I was high a lot when I was sixteen...